Tug-o-war

Monday we accepted an offer on our house, which means we are moving! It also means that I am so sad I could cry. And actually, I have, a lot. We have had our house on the market for one year and eight months. You would think by now that I would be absolutely ecstatic that we finally sold. However, since it has taken so long, selling just seemed like something that would happen sometime in the future that I actually put it out of my mind. So now that it is actually going to happen, I feel very unprepared. My emotions are very raw and I feel an absurd amount of sadness that I have to leave my life here in this neighborhood. It's silly and incredibly selfish, but my life is here. I don't want to leave all of my friends behind. I know I will make new friends in our new neighborhood, but I want these friends. They are my girls night buddies, my ladies lunch group, my support, my sanity and my best friends. It's not like we are moving out of the country, we are moving across town. You would think that moving a few miles away wouldn't rock my friendship world. But I've seen it happen. People move out of a neighborhood and they move on. You make new friends in your new neighborhood and your old friends in your old neighborhood move on too. I don't want to be forgotten! I sound like a nine year old little girl sad to move away from my best friend next door. I've been there, done that. And now I'm doing it again! My heart is in the midst of a tug-o-war. Happy to get a new home / so sad to have to move.
Last night after a spontaneous girls night to go see the late showing of Valentine's Day, I came home and cried my eyes out. I have got to get a grip on my wallowing in self pity. Really, it's going to be fine. I can't waste any more time worrying about my social life. I need to concentrate on finding the perfect home for my growing family. It will be great. All will be well. It is a blessing to add new friends to the old friends and keep the circle growing :) No more sadness, only great anticipation in the changes to come.